October 29, 2011

Boo-Tastic

I am not the biggest fan of Halloween.

First, there's just too much candy going around. And I'm not 8 anymore, so Trick-or-Treat means nothing to me.

Second, I don't care for dressing up. I can never think of a creative costume for an adult. And I'm not one of those girls who use Halloween solely as a chance to dress in a risque manner. And I quote, "Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it."-- Mean Girls

But one thing I DO love about Halloween is that it is in the fall. Fall is pretty much the best season ever. I love the cooler weather. I love the leaves changing colors. I love wearing longer sleeves and jackets and boots and drinking hot coffee. I love seeing all the fall decorations, carving pumpkins, visiting corn mazes, and spending time outside.

And another thing I like about Halloween is the scary movies they show on TV. Like-- movie marathons. Those horrible marathons where they show all 75 of the "Halloween" or "Friday the 13th" franchise films. Awfully fantastic! You can't beat scary movies.

The only sad thing about scary movies is that I rarely find them "scary". So I have composed a list of my favorite scary movies. Which may not be "scary". You can watch and decide for yourself. (Also, these are in no particular order)

  • Paranormal Activity (anything demonic is super creepy because it could actually happen)
  • The Hills Have Eyes (side note: NEVER take an unmarked road through the desert)
  • The 6th Sense (Yes, I know it's easy to make fun of, but at the time it was scary)
  • The Descent (I will never go spelunking... EVER. This movie was more scary when it was about claustrophobia-- not about blind monsters who eat you)
  • Saw (How twisted was the ending of this movie? I can't even watch...)
  • The Silence of the Lambs (Props to Anthony Hopkins for being fantastically creepy)
  • The Ring (Also easy to mock, but seriously-- did that girl just come out of the TV?!? And after you watch it... you always look at your phone... wondering...)
  • Jaws (Yes, I know it's not technically a Halloween-ish movie... But I still can't swim in the ocean without thinking a shark is going to eat me)
  • Child's Play (I don't care who you are-- a demonic doll that kills people is scary.)
  • Misery (Kathy Bates makes the most excellent psycho. And that scene with the broken legs-- oh. my. goodness.)
  • Signs (Mel Gibson and aliens. What more do you need?)
And then there are those movies that are supposedly scary... But always make me giggle
  • Halloween (the original) How slow can Michael Myers get? He is the slowest murderer of all time.
  • Nightmare on Elm Street (original) Seriously hokey. And Johnny Depp is so young. Not even slightly scary.
  • Scream-- A classic teen thriller. Also a little hokey. Too bad Drew Barrymore dies in the first few minutes. She was a better actress than all the other kids.
  • I know What You Did Last Summer-- and I'm going to murder you because I can (should've been the rest of the title)
  • The Hitcher-- Yes, let's pick up a strange man in the middle of nowhere. Sounds like an idea with a happy ending.
  • Secret Window-- The ending where he (SPOILER) kills his wife... then grows corn on top of her body and is eating it. Really? Laughter abounds.
  • Blair Witch-- 3 teens out in the woods with a camera. Most of the time I'm thinking "What are they saying? Why is this acting so horrible?" And once again I giggle.
  • The Grudge-- Oh, that house is haunted? And if I go in there I will die? Ok. I think I will go in anyway. Because I'm so intelligent.
  • Tremors-- Giant worms in the ground trying to eat us? And Kevin Bacon? This is definitely a winner!
I could go on for hours, but I won't. Tell me what your favorite "scary" movie is-- and whether it's your favorite because it makes you jump or because it makes you laugh. I'm always looking for something new to watch.

1 comment:

  1. we saw The Descent together. Remember? it was when we were in New York! That was truly a terrifying movie. But I am not like you. I thought the Grudge was one of the creepiest movies ever. It actually gave me this weird neurotic fear of things under my bed. now I have to stuff as much crap as I can under there to make sure that there will be no room for dead asian girls with long black hair. The Descent would have scared me like that too if I was insane enough to go gallivanting around in uncharted caves miles below the earth. Thankfully, I am not that insane and I will be staying away from all caves, big and small, thank you very much.

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