August 28, 2010

Funny You Should Say That...

Ok-- so the other night-- a typical night-- I was having trouble going to sleep. My parents have been kind enough (or perhaps it's cruel of them?) to put a flat screen TV in my room with full satellite access... So now when I can't sleep, I can just turn on the boob tube (who came up with that anyway?) Back to the story:

I turn on Late Night w/ Jimmy Fallon (sad that Conan is no longer on it) and watched a little. On this particular episode, Jimmy had asked his fans to send in weird things that their parents do... He got quite a listing. Such as: "One time my father called my cell phone. When I answered he asked me if I had my cell phone." They all made me laugh. But perhaps my favorite was this one:

"My parents favorite saying is, 'You got baked beans. You got a party.'"

This made me laugh. A lot. I wish it could be on a tshirt- in fact, I am tempted to make it a tshirt. And I am also tempted to use it as often as possible in everyday conversation. I wonder how many strange looks I can garner? New goal in life!

I did a little bit of research and found some other funny sayings... Enjoy!

1. If I wanted to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cat.
2. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
3. Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
4. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
5. Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
6. I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.
7. There cannot be a crisis today, my schedule is already full.
8. I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
9. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
10. A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking...
11. Budget: A method for going broke methodically.
12. Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.
13. Death is hereditary.
14. When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
15. Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
16. Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
17. They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.
18. Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

Do you have any weird sayings? Or have you heard any? Please feel free to share.

1 comment:

  1. i dont have any funny things to say at this moment. but i laughed at a lot of these and felt like many of them are true....

    ReplyDelete